That pattern of holding onto the painful things can slowly darken the rest of our moments, even long after they happened.
But we can change that.
The Optimistic Writing Method
Use writing to establish new paths of attention — journaling in a therapeutic direction.
A simple daily writing practice — for anyone who can spare ten minutes and one true thing, even on a day that had very little in it.
WhenOnce a day
How longTen minutes
WhatThe good, true moments of your last 24 hours
The practice
Write every day about your good memories from the past 24 hours.
Write every day. Once, for at least ten minutes. If you feel you can elaborate, continue writing.
Write about your good memories from the past 24 hours. Someone said something nice about you; you accomplished something that showed a commendable skill; you demonstrated intelligence, wisdom, or kindness, or you simply enjoyed something. You recalled and reflected on a virtue or a good deed you did in the past. Write about all of that. Try to elaborate, and stay longest on the trait that is the complete opposite of what you believe about yourself. You can write less if you already see that positive aspect in yourself. Write in the sequence of the places and times you moved through during your day.
Write about facts.
If you hate the rain, do not write that you love the rain. Instead, do not mention the rain, or mention anything positive you see in it, provided it is something you genuinely believe.
Unlike general self-help guidelines about being positive, I am not asking you to adopt positivity or a positive attitude without basis in your experience. I am asking you to write about facts — about something you really feel and experience.
You're going to weave good feelings on a daily basis, to make a colourful spectrum of memories of simple and small things that made you feel positive. Why not remember these moments, or re-remember them again, and highlight them with elaborate description every day.
Write
Don’t write
Optimistic writing is fact-based — it doesn’t offer baseless affirmations.
As the writing goes on, the memory grows larger and clearer.
Do not write about neutral or negative matters.
When journaling ends up being a place to document our negative moments, we end up strengthening them in our attention and memory. So, don't write about them.
Don’t write
Write about your moments of connection with people.
Write especially about the good moments where you feel people's kindness or they feel yours, or when you laugh with someone or have a heartfelt conversation.
Write
Try to write creatively.
For instance
Describe more, analyze less.
Try to describe a moment rather than pick it apart. Elaborating what something looked, sounded, or felt like is what trains attention; explaining or reasoning about why it happened doesn't do the same work — and research on writing about good experiences suggests that over-analyzing one can even blunt its benefit.
The optimistic writing method is more than the rules above — there are many themes that can help different people in different ways.
Themes
Have you ever thought of an idea that helped you live with a crisis that had been consuming your thinking for days, or even months?
Many people arrive at the same path of thought: “I’ve worried enough and nothing happened, so I won’t worry this time.” That is an example of a theme. I didn’t invent the themes, and probably no one person did — they are soothing directions of thinking that find their way into our patterns of thought. With the optimistic writing method we only organize them, define them, and introduce them to people who may have forgotten them.
Some themes are shared across cultures; some are well-known concepts found in proverbs, in religious texts, or in psychology.
Start tonight — just ten minutes.
This method has helped some people. It might help you too.
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